Best TV Episodes, December 2013

(I'm pretty burned out from the collective 14,557 words I wrote for my end-of-2013 lists over the last couple weeks, so I'm gonna keep this month's Best TV Episodes feature short and sweet. I know I said the same thing almost verbatim a year ago, but this time I really mean it! I just need a break from typing, you guys.)

10. Supernatural, Season 9 Episode 9 - "Holy Terror"

I've learned from perusing forums and Tumblr that a lot of Supernatural fans were less than thrilled with the Ezekiel-related shock twist at the end of this midseason finale. But what can I say? I dig it. I love when a show pulls the rug out from under me.

9. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 9 - "Three Ghosts"

Great, emotional, action-packed midseason finale with an awesome final reveal. Seeing Oliver Queen put on the proper Green Arrow mask for the first time gave goosebumps even to me, someone who never gave first fuck about the Green Arrow before watching this show.

8. Bob's Burgers, Season 4 Episode 7 - "Bob and Deliver"

Stories that put Tina and Bob Belcher together almost always delight, as do stories set at Wagstaff School, so making Bob the substitute teacher for Tina's cooking class was unsurprisingly funny and charming.

7. Scandal, Season 3 Episode 10 - "A Door Marked Exit"

This episode is almost entirely ranked this high for Papa Pope's "You are a boy!" monologue to Fitz. The rest of the episode was pretty good; not mind-blowing. But that monologue is some of my favorite TV dialogue of 2013.

6. American Dad, Season 9 Episode 8 - "Minstrel Krampus"

American Dad culled together lesser-known Christmas mythology, imagery and themes from Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin, and some good old climactic ultraviolence for what is probably my favorite explicitly Christmas-themed TV episode of 2013.

5. Awkward, Season 3 Episode 20 - "Who I Want to Be"

As a kinda-sorta series finale (Awkward is coming back next year, but showrunner Lauren Iungerich and her very idiosyncratic voice are out, sinking my enthusiasm for the show by about 95%), "Who I Want to Be" put a satisfying emotional button on three years of this warm, witty high school sitcom.

4. Homeland, Season 3 Episode 12 - "The Star"

I actually felt things – emotions, and all that! – during "The Star," which basically by default makes it the best hour of Homeland's third season. I also appreciate that it followed the season's story through to its only logical conclusion and didn't punk out like the show has in the past.

3. The Walking Dead, Season 4 Episode 8 - "Too Far Gone"

Oh, ok, so here's the awesome zombie spectacle the rest of America apparently sees in The Walking Dead every week as to make it TV's highest-rated scripted show, in the form of the big Team Rick vs. Governor battle we never got at the end of season 3. Now if I could only see The Walking Dead deliver such visceral thrills more than once a year. Baby steps!

2. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 8 - "The Scientist"

I put maybe sixty seconds of thought in my entire life towards the existence of superhero the Flash before watching "The Scientist," so it's a big compliment that I came out the other end a big and instant fan of Barry Allen, hopeful to see him more in Arrow in 2014 and already ready for next fall's Flash spinoff. Great, fun character.

1. American Dad, Season 9 Episode 6 - "Independent Movie"

I'll quote myself from my American Dad writeup a few days ago: "For the record, American Dad and Bob's Burgers were neck and neck in these rankings – the latter even a touch ahead – until Dad's December 1st episode "Independent Movie," a sendup of indie coming-of-age flicks and the Fox Searchlight formula that calls to mind Galaxy Quest and "Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas" in how note-perfect a spoof it is." Yep. That's pretty much it!

Top Ten TV Episodes of 2013

You know my fifty favorite TV shows of 2013. Here are my favorite individual episodes. Now, for the record, there are many, many more episodes I wanted to include – the fact that Hannibal, Bunheads, Bob's Burgers, Justified, Scandal, Arrested Development and 30 Rock are all excluded from this list pains me. But if I cracked the doors a little more this would suddenly go from a ten-plus-episode list to a hundred-episode list, so I had to keep this club just a bit exclusive. Starting with a few runners-up I couldn't not mention, then rolling right into the top ten (with episode blurbs adapted from what I previously wrote in my monthly Best TV Episodes lists):

Runners-Up (alphabetical by show): Fringe, Season 5 Episode 13 - "An Enemy of Fate," Futurama, Season 7 Episode 26 - "Meanwhile," Game of Thrones, Season 3 Episode 4 - "And Now His Watch Is Ended," Orange Is the New Black, Season 1 Episode 11 - "Tall Men With Feelings," Spartacus, Season 3 Episode 6 - "Spoils of War," Spartacus, Season 3 Episode 8 - "Separate Paths"

10. Arrow, Season 1 Episode 23 - "Sacrifice"
Arrow had hands-down the best network season finale this spring. "Sacrifice" almost had a Buffy's "The Gift"-esque hugeness in scale and sheer climactic feel to it as Starling City began literally crumbling under the influence of the season's overarching supervillain plot. And Arrow didn't just tell, but showed buildings collapsing and streets imploding and anarchy abound, and it was huge and frightful and awesome. The episode had operatic, outsized action and emotion and a twist that floored me in its final minutes. "Sacrifice" is exactly what a pulpy action/adventure TV serial should look like.
9. Parenthood, Season 4 Episode 13 - "Small Victories"
"Small Victories" was a fantastic, achingly emotional hour of Parenthood that "took on" the abortion issue by refusing to "take it on" at all, instead depicting something overly politicized as the deeply personal choice it is. And the relative heaviness of that story was balanced by a comedic B-plot about body odor and pubic hair that had me laughing embarrassingly loud. This episode succinctly sums up everything that is good and vital about Parenthood.
8. Breaking Bad, Season 5 Episode 16 - "Felina"

(Spoilers follow!) Part of what makes Breaking Bad great (and stand out in contrast against most attempts at "quality television" that have followed) is that, for all its darkness and misery and its focus on consequences and its character arcs of supreme, literary power, it can be a really, really fun show with thick veins of pulp running through it. Always has been, from Walt destroying Tuco's office with magic bomb crystals to several instances of cool guys not looking at explosions to the half-Terminator/half-Anton Chigurh Salamanca twins to Two-Face Gus Fring fixing his tie before dying. And it's in that spirit that one of dramatic television's great narratives ends with its protagonist building and deploying a Nazi-killing robot. Awesome!

7. Game of Thrones, Season 3 Episode 9 - "The Rains of Castamere"

After patiently holding it in for three years, being able to finally shout "RED WEDDING RED WEDDING RED WEDDING RED WEDDING!!!!!" at the top of my lungs across every corner of the internet felt so very, very good. I have nothing to add to the discussion surrounding this episode's infinitely-dissected final ten minutes (beyond one last good old-fashioned "Holy fucking shit!"), but even outside of that iconic, unforgettable sequence it was a great hour for the Jon Snow, Arya and Daenerys storylines too. It's an episode worthy of being called the spiritual successor to season 1's "Baelor."

6. American Dad, Season 8 Episode 18 - "Lost In Space"

Detaching entirely from the titular American dad and core Smith family, "Lost In Space" follows alien prisoner Jeff Fischer to a space station above Roger's home planet, where he tries to figure out how to escape captivity in a big, stylish, intergalactic musical action-adventure comedy extravaganza that might just be the year's most purely ambitious sitcom episode. It almost felt like a whole space opera compressed into 22 minutes (with jokes), complete with impressive alien design and massive, complicated "sets" that showed a hell of a lot of visual imagination. It had emotional depth and a bittersweet, melancholy ending you'd never associate with the MacFarlane animation empire.

5. Switched at Birth, Season 2 Episode 9 - "Uprising"

I mostly just think of ABC Family's Switched at Birth as a teen drama – a far above-average one, but just a teen drama regardless – so it was a pleasant surprise to see them produce this formally and emotionally ambitious hour. The students of Carlton School for the Deaf rise up in an occupation protest when the city moves to shut their school down, which is, except for a few spoken lines at the episode's beginning and one more at its end, depicted entirely in silence with nothing but subtitled sign language to better reflect the viewpoint of the deaf characters. It was unique and ballsy, but more importantly than having a great gimmick, it had a great gimmick rooted entirely in character, thematically relevant and tied to a strong emotional throughline.

4. Spartacus, Season 3 Episode 9 - "The Dead and the Dying"

Years ago I read about how the real historical Spartacus held his own gladiatorial games to honor a fallen brother, using captured Roman soldiers as gladiators, and I spent all of Spartacus: War of the Damned nervously eyeing the ticking-down episode count, wondering whether or not showrunner Steven DeKnight had just decided to skip this particularly juicy historical nugget. But it turns out, nope, he was just delaying our pleasure, saving one of the show's finest outings for its penultimate installment.

DeKnight tweaked history to bring our heroes into the action (rather than having the Romans fight each other, in the show they fight the former slave/gladiator main characters), and, to be blunt, it was deliriously fucking awesome. In a show that is normally one of the most thoughtful and contemplative and consequence-heavy on television in its depiction of violence, it was enormous fun to see an episode just kick back and let it rip with an hour of pure pump-your-fists-and-cheer-out-loud bloody spectacle for perhaps the first time since Gods of the Arena. Just awesome.

3. Breaking Bad, Season 5 Episode 14 - "Ozymandias"

The crucial flip side of Breaking Bad's deliciously pulpy essence – what raises it from entertainment to televised literature – lies in the darkness, the misery and the consequences on full display in "Ozymandias," which Vince Gilligan himself has declared his masterpiece and the best episode of the series. I'm not 100% sure I'm ready to go that far – I need to rewatch the entire series and see "One Minute" and "Full Measure" and "Crawl Space" and "Face Off" and "Dead Freight" again first – but it is as intense, brutal and harrowing an hour of television as I've ever seen. If "Felina" is the climax to Breaking Bad, the entertaining crime/thriller saga, "Ozymandias" is the climax to Breaking Bad, the bleak tale of a man losing his soul and the horrors he rains upon everyone around him. Beginning to end, "Ozymandias" is an episode about consequences, and karma brought its full fury against Walter White and his family in service of just that.

2. The Legend of Korra, Season 2 Episodes 7 & 8 - "Beginnings" (two-parter)

Easily the best episode (well, technically episodes, but they aired together and go together, so whatever) of The Legend of Korra to date and what would have to be in contention to be called the best episode of the entire Avatar franchise, "Beginnings" took us back to the prehistory of the Avatar world and showed us the life and genesis and battles of Wan, the first Avatar. And, as far as genre prequels go, let's call it the exact opposite of The Phantom Menace: Something great and beautiful and damn near perfect in every way. It enchanted me, it intrigued me, it thrilled me, it moved me, it left me both grinning like a dope and damn near on the cusp of tears. It's basically Korra's stab at a Miyazaki "concept episode," and it does Princess Mononoke proud.

If you were to pluck "Beginnings" from its home on TV and call it a movie, I don't know that I've enjoyed an animated film so much since... god, WALL•E, maybe? Very, very few episodes of television have made me feel giddy and excited and moved and just freaking in awe of the sheer potential of onscreen storytelling like this in years. Maybe ever. The animation? Beautiful, breathtaking. The emotion? Goosebumps all over my body. The action? Immensely badass. The sheer scope of its storytelling? It rivals entire epic fantasy narratives like The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter in the space of about forty minutes of television. "Beginnings" is TV of mythic power. I love, love, love, love, love it.

1. Spartacus, Season 3 Episode 10 - "Victory"

I've already written and talked about 2013's finest television achievement at arguably excessive length and have little more to add on the subject. But I'll emphasize one last time that Spartacus' finale really had its cake and ate it too, providing a rich emotional feast and the conclusions to years of thoughtful character work and tying a totally satisfying thematic bow on everything while also remembering to give us a final battle sequence that made Game of Thrones' "Blackwater" look like the skirmish at the end of a Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episode. It's one of the best series finales and one of the best episodes of television I've ever seen.

Top Ten TV Shows of 2013

And we arrive at last at the best of the best. This top ten has me more melancholy than last year's, as three of these shows are now gone from the airwaves, resting forever in the annals of TV history, and a couple more are officially getting up there in years. But where there's clouds there's a silver lining, because a few of these shows are yet newborn babes just getting their runs started. On to it:

10. American Dad (Fox)
Best 2013 Episode: Season 8 Episode 18 - "Lost In Space" | Up 2 from 2012

My highest-ranked comedy this year, American Dad – despite being a downright ancient show that's been on since less than a year after I graduated high school – is still swinging for the fences. Oh, it had plenty of bad episodes this year. As many as anything else in my top twenty. But the four or five times a year that its producers really buckle down and decide they want to make something great, they're capable of churning out half-hours of such ambition, imagination and artistry that I bow before them. "Lost In Space," which follows Hayley Smith's kidnapped stoner husband Jeff to the mothership of the aliens who took him, is my favorite sitcom episode of 2013. It packs a whole great animated sci-fi action-comedy musical with its own mythology and epic settings into just 22 minutes, and, even if it weren't funny, would be something to behold on account of sheer scale alone.

For the record, American Dad and Bob's Burgers were neck and neck in these rankings – the latter even a touch ahead – until Dad's December 1st episode "Independent Movie," a sendup of indie coming-of-age flicks and the Fox Searchlight formula that calls to mind Galaxy Quest and "Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas" in how note-perfect a spoof it is. But the two shows really function as yin and yang; Bob's as the warm and realistic animated sitcom and Dad as the dark and surreal one. I watch both back-to-back every week and they complement each other perfectly. They're milk and cereal, baby.

9. Parenthood (NBC)
Best 2013 Episode: Season 4 Episode 13 - "Small Victories" | Down 4 from 2012

I'll admit first thing that Parenthood had its problems this year. This fall, I should really say, as the big albatross around season 5's neck has been Kristina Braverman's mayoral run, something which dragged the show in a very weird West Wing-lite direction that just isn't what I watch this bighearted family drama for at all. I'd almost compare it to the "Landry murders a rapist" subplot in Jason Katims' last show Friday Night Lights in how weirdly perpendicular to the premise of the show it seems (in fact, the parallel is almost spookily exact, with the offending subplots both being introduced in season premieres of each show and wrapped up in episode 9 of the same seasons).

But I'm willing to overlook mayoral shenanigans and top ten Parenthood (yes, "top ten" is a verb now!) the third year running for two reasons: One, that subplot is over. Two – and this is something I can't even say about several shows above Parenthood on this list – I care. You see, I'm a pretty emotionally guarded guy when it comes to fiction and forming true, genuine emotional investments in characters. I'm not generally a crier when watching TV, not a gasper or an applauder or any of that shit. You could count with fingers and toes to spare the number of TV shows ever made where I actually care about the characters on that level. Parenthood is one of those shows. I ache for the characters' pains, I cheer their victories; I'm invested in their lives top-to-bottom with all my heart. And that's why Parenthood, story problems aside, remains one of my favorite shows on television.

8. The Legend of Korra (Nickelodeon)
Best 2013 Episode: Season 2 Episode 7/8 - "Beginnings" | Same Rank as 2012

Oh hey second consecutive show in my top ten that was riddled with pretty significant problems this year! Yes, the first half of Korra's second season is animated by the same studio who does Naruto, whose work is clearly inferior to Studio Mir's. Many episodes are just messes of disconnected subplots. And the season's climactic final battle is won via a deus ex machina that makes the end of The Matrix Revolutions look smartly-foreshadowed and narratively logical.

But then... "Beginnings." The two-part Studio Mir-animated prequel episode that takes us back ten millennia in the Avatar universe to show us the genesis of the Avatar. I'mma be straight with y'all: I fucking love this episode. I love it as much as anything I've seen on TV all year. As much as anything I've seen in a movie theater all year. As much as any sex I've had all year. I love it for how visually inventive it is, and how emotional it is, and how epic in its timeframe and geographical span and impact on this fictional universe it is, and just how narratively and thematically and mythologically satisfying it is. One particular moment at the end (when Raava says "We are bonded forever." and the thirty seconds immediately after) literally gave me goosebumps. I watched this two-parter four times before the next episode hit.

It's time to cut the shit and call "Beginnings" what it is: The best animated medieval fantasy film since Princess Mononoke came out in 1997. A short, roughly 45-minute film, sure. But a masterpiece nonetheless. (Though I will say that Disney's great new princess flick Frozen is no slouch either.) And that's why The Legend of Korra is in my top ten.

7. Arrow (The CW)
Best 2013 Episode: Season 1 Episode 23 - "Sacrifice" | Up 17 from 2012

The CW and former Everwood producer Greg Berlanti's vigilante/superhero drama Arrow is my hands-down, far-and-away, nothing-else-even-in-contention pick for 2013's most improved TV show. Starting in the last few episodes of season 1 and continuing all through season 2, this Green Arrow adaptation stepped it up about twenty notches in almost literally everything from what it was last year: Character development and character dynamics, humor, cinematography, action scenes, excitement, pacing, thematic depth; all now firing on all cylinders. A year ago my overall stance on Arrow was "It's not bad." Today? I count the hours until new episodes and devour each one as a ravenous beast.

That Arrow is a better superhero show than Marvel's Agents of N.C.I.S. S.H.I.E.L.D. goes without saying. While that show futzes about with its disposable little cases of the week, Arrow is a layered, propulsive serial. While that show's wooden cast continues to feel like they're reciting lines at each other, Arrow's characters have become rounded and engaging, with real dynamics. And while that show is restricted to barely even using the Z-list Marvel characters no one's heard of, Arrow delivers the DC Comics goods: Barry Allen (aka The Flash), Black Canary, Deathstroke, China White, Count Vertigo, Deadshot and Solomon Grundy just this year. It's even namedropped Ra's al Ghul! (Though he hasn't appeared yet and when he does it's admittedly pretty damn unlikely he'll be Liam Neeson.)

What may go less without saying – but stands no less true – is that Arrow is the best onscreen superhero story of 2013, period. You can keep your Iron Man 3 and Man of Steel and The Wolverine and Thor: The Dark World. I'll be over here watching Arrow, which is engaging in storytelling more vital than any of them. With a Flash spinoff coming next fall from the same team I can officially say I'm a million times more interested and invested in Greg Berlanti's televised DC Comics universe than Zack Snyder's cinematic one. Fingers crossed we get to see Berlanti's take on Wonder Woman one day.

6. Orange Is the New Black (Netflix)
Best 2013 Episode: Season 1 Episode 11 - "Tall Men With Feelings" | Debuted 2013

I always found Weeds – even its reportedly best seasons – pretty tough to sit through, and after the Girls and The Americans incidents I've become super wary when it comes to TV critics jerking off to new shows all over the internet before they even air. So you'll understand why I was hesitant and held off a few weeks when it came to hitting play on the first episode of Weeds creator Jenji Kohan's new women-in-prison drama Orange Is the New Black, less despite and more because of all the critical adulation.

But hey, stopped clock, twice a day and all that. I eventually did fire up the pilot episode "I Wasn't Ready," and proceeded to inhale the rest of the first season in the space of about a week. Goddamnit if Orange Is the New Black isn't just as good as everyone said.

A lot of why I adore this show probably has to do with tone. In a year when damn near every new non-broadcast drama from The Americans to House of Cards to The Bridge to Low Winter Sun seemed to be trying to one-up all that came before it in how utterly bleak and despairing and joyless it could be, Orange Is the New Black is glorious sunlight bursting through the clouds. It has fleeting moments of darkness and violence, sure, but they're earned, and it is ultimately a show about community, about finding joy in the mundane, about the bonds between us rather than the antihero bullshit that drives us apart. Granted, said bonds are forced on the characters by the shackles of prison, but aren't so many great TV shows about people forced together by circumstance? High school-set teen dramas, workplace sitcoms, and so on – Orange Is the New Black is a new and wonderful spin on classic formula.

Best TV Episodes, November 2013

I'm gonna level with y'all straight up: Since I started doing these monthly Best TV Episodes lists, there has never been a single month I've had a harder time whittling down to just ten. As I type this, I'm staring at a list of over twenty episodes that aired last month and struggling to cut a single one. So I'm going to break protocol and do some (alphabetical, unranked) runners-up. I might also keep my episode blurbs a little on the short side, because I'm working on some other posts for December. I hope you'll forgive me my trespasses.

Runners-up:

• Almost Human, Season 1 Episode 3 - "Are You Receiving?"

Almost Human gets a thumbs up from me so far. I enjoy its Fringe-meets-Blade Runner-meets-Robocop vibe. This hostage thriller episode added Die Hard onto the list of influences, so no wonder I dig it.

• Arrow, Season 2 Episode 7 - "State v. Queen"

Seth Gabel returns as Count Vertigo, the most enjoyably over-the-top, Dark Knight Joker-esque villain in Arrow's rogues gallery. The episode's courtroom scenes weren't exactly the best, but I still enjoyed it on the strength of Vertigo and the final plot twist, which has far-reaching ramifications for the series.

• Awkward, Season 3 Episode 17 - "The Campaign Fail"

Protagonist Jenna Hamilton's face-heel turn provided MTV's high school sitcom with one of its stronger story arcs since season 1, but this episode, with her returning to good and seeking forgiveness from the friends and family she's wronged, is stronger still.

• New Girl, Season 3 Episode 8 - "Menus"

Not gonna lie; this episode is here almost exclusively for Nick's line "What's up, Jason Street?" to wheelchair Winston. That's literally all it takes to get me to love your show: Throw in a Friday Night Lights reference, win my undying allegiance.

• Revolution, Season 2 Episode 9 - "Everyone Says I Love You"

With the possible exception of The Newsroom, Revolution is easily 2013's most improved show. I'm actually enjoying it now, which is just crazy. This episode was pretty freakin' crazy too. Hopefully Revolution's upswing continues into 2014.

10. The Legend of Korra, Season 2 Episodes 13 & 14 - "Darkness Falls" & "Light in the Dark" (two-parter)

Much like season 1's closing moments, Korra season 2's climactic battle is way too reliant on magical deus ex machina to get the heroes out of the impossible corner the show has written them into. Let me put it this way: I was 100% digging the finale when it was doing its riff on Godzilla. When it turned into Pacific Rim, however, it got kind of absurd. Nevertheless, gripes aside, the action kicked ass and the animation was immensely beautiful. Still-human Unalaq in full Dark Avatar regalia was terrifying.

9. Supernatural, Season 9 Episode 7 - "Bad Boys"

This episode was just a great, nostalgic Supernatural throwback to the days of seasons 1 and 2. No demons, no angels, no heaven, no hell, not a single regular or recurring character save Sam and Dean; just a straight-up ghost story, salting and burning bones and all. It was like the Supernatural equivalent of going back and playing some NES. The good old days, baby.

8. Boardwalk Empire, Season 4 Episode 12 - "Farewell Daddy Blues"

Ok, I'm gonna potentially make a few enemies here: Outside of episodes 5 and 8, which I included in last month's roundup, I'm not sure I really loved this season of Boardwalk Empire. I still liked it, but didn't love it the way I did the last two years. It's still a beautiful and sometimes exciting show, but its rhythms have become immensely familiar. It's just not a show that truly challenges itself on fundamental levels. Ergo, I liked but didn't love its fourth season finale. It did include an amazing, brutal fight scene with Eli Thompson, but the episode's major character death felt sudden and unearned.

7. Scandal, Season 3 Episode 7 - "Everything's Coming Up Mellie"

This episode was just completely and utterly bug-nuts crazy from start to finish, which is the pitch Scandal operates best at. The flashbacks with First Lady Mellie Grant were crazy and went to a shockingly dark place. The present-day Quinn story went to a crazy, dark and blood-soaked place, too. The revelation about the Vice President's husband's sexuality was just the goofily wacky cherry on top. Shonda Rhimes deserves adulation for the way she keeps this show's pacing cranked to a perpetual 11.

6. Homeland, Season 3 Episode 9 - "One Last Time"

Oh hey Homeland! Pretty surprising to see you on this list - I thought you didn't come 'round these parts anymore! What "One Last Time" pulled off in its Brody story that the rest of Homeland season 3 has failed at is delivering a story with clean, coherent and immediate stakes. Even the Dana Brody scene in this episode was narratively relevant and emotionally affecting. That right there may be the single most shocking twist Homeland season 3 has pulled off to date.

5. Bob's Burgers, Season 4 Episode 5 - "Turkey in a Can"

After some episodes earlier this season with almost preposterously high, life-or-death stakes – namely "A River Runs Through Bob" and "Seaplane!" – for its Thanksgiving episode Bob's Burgers reclaimed greatness by returning the Belchers home and setting nearly every minute of the episode there. The concept here wasn't bottle episode, though, but "murder" mystery as Bob tries to track down who in the house ruined his Thanksgiving turkey. Both the jokes and the genre trappings worked completely. Great, fun episode.

4. The Legend of Korra, Season 2 Episode 10 - "A New Spiritual Age"

Korra and Jinora's journey into the Spirit World makes for one of the best episodes of Korra's second season, fully shedding all the techno/steampunk trappings that exist in Republic City and returning to true straight-up fantasy storytelling. The Avatar: The Last Airbender cameos were impossible not to delight at, and the spirits themselves ranged the gamut from adorable to majestic to terrifying. Awesome "Oh shit what happens next!"-inducing cliffhanger, too.

3. Parenthood, Season 5 Episode 9 - "Election Day"

I'm on record as being not exactly in love with Parenthood season 5's mayoral election subplot, but a huge part of that had to do with terror that the story was going to go in a direction it really shouldn't and Parenthood was suddenly going to become The West Wing-lite. Now that I know that wasn't their plan, I dislike it a lot less in retrospect, and its climactic episode "Election Day" was actually quite good. Even aside from Kristina, the Crosby and Max stories were both very funny, and Julia and Joel's story was quite harrowing in a "Mom and dad are fighting!" kind of way. Parenthood is ramping up to a strong finish for 2013.

2. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 5 - "League of Assassins"

Not merely continuing but intensifying and upping the stakes following the revelation of the Canary's identity in the previous episode, "League of Assassins" shows Arrow as the polished, height-of-its-powers badass weekly superhero flick it is. The clock tower action scene was just so cinematic and exciting, and even beyond the wicked fight choreography it was all rooted in character dynamics and high emotional stakes. That's exactly what genre TV at its best is all about and should aspire to. This episode also showed off what a strong character Quentin Lance has become. Once practically the Sheriff Lamb of Arrow, I now ache for his pain as much as anyone else on the show.

1. The Legend of Korra, Season 2 Episode 12 - "Harmonic Convergence"

Despite their identical #1 rankings on my Best TV Episodes lists, no, I do not think "Harmonic Convergence" is anywhere near as good as last month's "Beginnings," an installment that is honestly in contention as one of my favorite hours of TV ever. But that doesn't mean "Harmonic Convergence" didn't kick a lot of ass. The massive, epic plane action sequence as Team Avatar attempts to invade Unalaq's base and reach the southern spirit portal was one of those scenes that truly shows off the potential of animation (plus imagination, of course), and how as a medium it can do on television things that just can't be done in live action sans hundreds of millions of dollars. The episode's ending also deserves credit as arguably 2013's greatest "HOLY FUCKING SHIT I NEED THE NEXT EPISODE NOWWW!!!"-inducing TV cliffhanger.

Best TV Episodes, October 2013

10. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 3 - "Broken Dolls"

It's been a dark TV year for me in a lot of ways: A solid half-dozen shows I adored ended (Spartacus, Fringe, 30 Rock, Breaking Bad, Bunheads, Futurama), and another half-dozen or so I started the year liking or even loving have lost their luster (we'll talk more about those at the end of December). But then, a green light piercing the darkness: Arrow. That little superhero show that inspired a "not bad" from me last fall has grown by leaps and bounds in 2013, its creative fire burning hot, and is now one of TV's pure kick-ass pleasures. "Broken Dolls" is just one of their more typical case-of-the-week installments, but the show is now so damn good that even those are worthy of my monthly list.

9. Scandal, Season 3 Episode 1 - "It's Handled"

First off, props to Scandal for finally popping its Tim's TV Talk Best TV Episodes list cherry. Like Arrow (and Orange Is the New Black, and Hannibal), Shonda Rhimes' The West Wing-on-crack opus has been something of a bright spot in a dark TV year for me, and its third season finale carried on nicely with the snappy pace and operatic melodrama of season 2. Joe Morton, who I know primarily from my roughly one million viewings of Terminator 2: Judgment Day, fits perfectly into the show as Olivia Pope's father, delivering lines with booming, Shakespearean magnitude.

8. Parenthood, Season 5 Episode 5 - "Let's Be Mad Together"

I'll be the first to admit: The mayoral election arc of Parenthood season 5? Not exactly my favorite thing the show's done. In fact I might go so far as to say that Kristina's election is to Parenthood as Landry murder is to Friday Night Lights: Just not the kind of story I normally love and revere this show for. But "Let's Be Mad Together" put the race on hold for a week, and good times were had by all. And by good I mean bittersweet, because this is Parenthood. Drunk Joel shopping for cake was delightful, and the subplot with Max's photography makes this honestly one of the best episodes for Max in the show's entire run to date. He's actually bordering on likable and sympathetic! For Max, that's a pretty big deal.

7. It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Season 9 Episode 5 - "Mac Day"

If it weren't for the badass hockey flick Goon from a couple years back, I'd have to call Seann William Scott's performance as Country Mac in "Mac Day" his best work since the original American Pie in 1999. Genuine celebrities and Always Sunny can feel like a slightly volatile combination, but by positioning Country Mac as the improved version of Regular Mac in every way – superior at stunts, a better fighter, a master of the ocular pat down and open instead of closeted with his homosexuality – Scott's star power merely emphasized how overmatched Mac was. After "The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award" from last month, I'd have to call "Mac Day" my second favorite Sunny of the year so far.

6. Boardwalk Empire, Season 4 Episode 5 - "Erlkönig"

One of the great pleasures of TV as a medium, and one that film rarely achieves in its allotted two-hour slices, is the ability to turn the spotlight on the supporting players, transforming glorified extras over years into rich, three-dimensional characters. (The classic Buffy episode "The Zeppo" commented on this directly.) Hence, this episode's focus on Nucky's body man Eddie Kessler, a character I would have called minor comic relief in the first couple seasons, proved quite powerful and moving, straight through to the haunting final shot. The fact that "Erlkönig" also included a huge gun battle in the Chicago subplot with the Capones and Van Alden and the cops is just icing on the cake.

5. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 4 - "Crucible"

The Canary has been a massive boon to Arrow in its second season, an immediately likable, interesting and badass addition to the ensemble (let's call her the anti-Laurel Lance in that regard), and the episode that revealed her true identity and background did not disappoint. Hell, it wasn't even really the main point of "Crucible," which also squeezed in a solid case of the week and an awesome "OH SNAP!"-inducing reveal about the big bad behind everything in the hour's closing seconds. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., pay attention: Arrow is showing you how to keep televised superhero storytelling aggressively paced, emotionally involving and hugely exciting. Watch it. Study it. Take notes.

4. Bob's Burgers, Season 4 Episode 2 - "Fort Night"

Last year's Bob's Burgers Halloween special, "Full Bars," was one of the show's bigger episodes in terms of scale and sheer number of newly-designed locales, with the Belcher kids exploring an entire adjacent town. So it seems a fitting counterpoint that this year's Halloween special "Fort Night" features the Belcher kids stuck in a small fort made of refrigerator boxes for most of the episode. It managed to combine the high stakes of a Halloween special (the fort is under threat of being crushed by a truck) and a chilling "villain" in Millie with the pleasures of a bottle episode. It's easily the best episode of season 4 so far.

3. Boardwalk Empire, Season 4 Episode 8 - "The Old Ship of Zion"

Though it has its merits all through the hour, amping the Chalky vs. Narcisse conflict up to the next level, "The Old Ship of Zion" is ultimately ranked this high on the strength of its final scene, where the visual cues and performances and general film grammar truly convinced me that a main character was about to die. It was, on account of this, one of the most intense and harrowing TV scenes of all of 2013. It's a powerful scene I'll remember for some time. I know I'm being vague as fuck here, but trust me, there's a reason.

2. Arrow, Season 2 Episode 1 - "City of Heroes"

Arrow had its work cut out for it trying to measure up to its debut season's epic finale, and I'm pleased and frankly a little shocked to report that they pulled it off. "City of Heroes" saw season 2 exploding out of the gate. Like season 1, it owes a huge debt to Chris Nolan's Dark Knight movies, but using the medium of television's strengths – namely a sprawling canvas – it was able to arguably improve on a couple concepts from those films. Firstly the realization and construction of Oliver's no-kill rule, something Batman Begins had to get through within the space of a couple scenes in its opening half-hour but which Arrow (the show) and Arrow (the superhero) has had some time to chew and ponder on.

Also, taking a page right from the opening scenes of The Dark Knight, the Arrow now has copycat vigilantes in town; copycats who wield guns and use lethal force. But unlike the chubby cosplayers from The Dark Knight, Arrow's copycats are ruthless military-trained killers. It was a potentially fascinating concept The Dark Knight didn't have the spare time to devote much attention to, but thanks to the medium of television, a whole hour can be set aside to explore it in depth. And that's why TV is cool.

1. The Legend of Korra, Season 2 Episodes 7 & 8 - "Beginnings" (two-parter)

Easily the best episode (well, technically episodes, but they aired together and they go together, so whatever) of The Legend of Korra to date and what would have to be in contention to be called the best episode of the entire Avatar franchise, "Beginnings" took us back to the prehistory of the Avatar world and showed us the life and genesis and battles of Wan, the first Avatar. And, as far as genre prequels go, let's call it the exact fucking opposite of The Phantom Menace: Something great and beautiful and damn near perfect in every way. It enchanted me, it intrigued me, it thrilled me, it moved me, it left me both grinning like a dope and damn near on the cusp of tears. It's basically Korra's stab at a Miyazaki "concept episode," and it does Princess Mononoke damn proud.

If you were to pluck "Beginnings" from its home on TV and call it a movie, I don't know that I've enjoyed an animated movie so much since... god, WALL•E, maybe? Very, very few episodes of television have made me feel giddy and excited and moved and just freaking in awe of the sheer potential of onscreen storytelling like this in years. Maybe ever. The animation? Beautiful. Breathtaking. The emotion? Goosebumps all over my body. The action scenes? Immensely badass. The sheer scope of its storytelling? It rivals entire epic fantasy narratives like The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter in the space of about forty minutes of television. "Beginnings" is TV of mythic power. I love, love, love, love, love it.

Ranking New Fall 2012-Spring 2013 Network TV Shows

(Presented without comment)

Televised atrocities that are an embarrassment to the entire medium:

33. Do No Harm (NBC) Canceled
32. Beauty and the Beast (The CW)
31. 666 Park Avenue (ABC) Canceled

Very bad-to-bad shows:

30. The Mob Doctor (Fox) Canceled
29. Partners (CBS) Canceled
28. Malibu Country (ABC) Canceled
27. Family Tools (ABC) Canceled
26. Made In Jersey (CBS) Canceled
25. Zero Hour (ABC) Canceled
24. Cult (The CW) Canceled
23. Guys With Kids (NBC) Canceled
22. Animal Practice (NBC) Canceled
21. Red Widow (ABC) Canceled

Middling shows that inspire no emotion:

20. How to Live With Your Parents For the Rest of Your Life (ABC) Canceled
19. Emily Owens, M.D. (The CW) Canceled
18. 1600 Penn (NBC) Canceled
17. Deception (NBC) Canceled
16. Golden Boy (CBS) Canceled
15. The Neighbors (ABC)
14. The New Normal (NBC) Canceled
13. Vegas (CBS) Canceled
12. The Following (Fox)
11. Chicago Fire (NBC)
10. The Carrie Diaries (The CW)

Shows not worth seeking out, but watchable if they happen to be on:

9. Elementary (CBS)
8. Ben and Kate (Fox) Canceled
7. Go On (NBC) Canceled
6. Last Resort (ABC) Canceled
5. Revolution (NBC)
4. The Mindy Project (Fox)

Shows I actually kinda like:

3. Nashville (ABC)

Shows I like very much:

2. Arrow (The CW)

Bona fide great television:

1. Hannibal (NBC)

Best TV Episodes, May 2013

10. Game of Thrones, Season 3 Episode 8 – "Second Sons"

While I love Game of Thrones – and the sheer novelty of a high fantasy series on this scale on the small screen continues to delight – there's been some drag in Westeros this season, and several instances where I've found myself thinking, "Ok, feel free to step up the pacing any moment now." Thankfully, "Second Sons" did just that with a relatively tight focus on King's Landing, Dragonstone and Yunkai, capped off with a nice little Sam vs. White Walker tag. Tyrion and Sansa's wedding and especially its reception were great set pieces full of tension and humor alike, and as an added bonus this episode is the first in a long time that actually measures up to Game of Thrones' generally hyperbolic reputation for extreme nudity.

9. Arrested Development, Season 4 Episode 1 – "Flight of the Phoenix"

Despite initially claiming Michael's second spotlight episode, "The B. Team," to be my preferred of Arrested Development season 4's Michael episodes, I'm afraid I'll have to prove what a noncommittal coward I am by going back on that just a week later. On reexamination and a little rewatching, I've decided that the fourth season premiere is actually one of the season's better episodes, if only for the pleasure of initially catching up with everyone, seeing Sudden Valley fill in with houses (but not people), Gob force-feeding Michael a forget-me-now and of course Michael mistakenly being voted out of a four-person housing situation. It's a strong kickoff with a strong focus on Michael and George Michael's relationship, perhaps the series' bedrock.

8. Arrested Development, Season 4 Episode 9 – "Smashed"

I wasn't especially crazy about Tobias' first season 4 spotlight, which got way too bogged down in DeBrie and Fantastic Four spoofing, but those very same elements were turned into things going in favor of Tobias' second episode. We get a great Tobias/Michael scene, Tobias acting as a analrapist theralist onscreen at length for the first time ever, and the return of the sung "Mr. F!" stinger. By all means, read more thoughts here.

7. Hannibal, Season 1 Episode 8 – "Fromage"

Hannibal turned its sights on the musical arts in this episode about a killer who very much enjoys crafting the strings for violins and cellos from human entrails. The beheaded "Cello Man" was one of the series' more chilling instillation-artist-kills to date, we pushed Will Graham and Hannibal Lecter's twisted friendship along nicely, and this normally patient and methodical series even found time for an amazingly kick-ass fight scene at this episode's climax. As an added bonus, "Fromage" also featured Dr. Lecter preparing some truly delicious-looking bread pudding, which I venture is probably even safe for non-cannibals to enjoy.

6. The Office, Season 9 Episode 23 – "Finale"

The Office's very good series finale at the tail end of two seasons I cared very little about is like a sudden orgasm seventeen minutes after you've lost interest in the sex you're having: It'd have been better much earlier, but still, you're glad for it. I'll miss the show very much and at the same time I'm so fucking relieved it's finally over. "Finale" wasn't often laugh-out-loud hilarious – sitcom finales rarely aspire to be – but managed to leave the show's entire cast in emotionally satisfying places. It went out with the bittersweet tang I'd always imagined this show, which was once one of my favorites on television, would have and should have. And yes, a salt-and-pepper Michael Scott showed up for a cameo, extended enough to be emotionally affecting but quick enough not to steal the show from anyone else. Thumbs way up.

5. Arrow, Season 1 Episode 23 – "Sacrifice"

Keeping in mind that we haven't seen what Hannibal has up its sleeve yet, Arrow has hands-down the best season finale of any network show so far this spring. It almost had a Buffy's "The Gift"-esque hugeness in scale and sheer climactic feel to it as Starling City began literally crumbling under the influence of the season's big supervillain plot. And the show didn't just tell, but showed buildings collapsing and streets imploding and anarchy abound, and it was huge and scary and awesome. The episode had big action, big emotion, big reveals and a twist that floored me in its final minutes. This is exactly what pulpy action/adventure TV serial season finales should look like.

4. Arrested Development, Season 4 Episode 12 – "Señoritis"

As I mentioned in my review of "Señoritis," I was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked Maeby's sole season 4 spotlight, as she'd never really been one of my favorite main characters in the original series. But this messy yet extremely enjoyable episode smooshes together a whole lot of character development, misunderstandings, Hollywood satire, reveals about previous episodes and Maeby and George Michael into of one the season's most entertaining and fast-paced half-hours. It also, in its final moments with the return of "Hey, whatcha tryin' to say to me?", contains one of the season's best callbacks to the original series.

3. American Dad, Season 8 Episode 18 – "Lost in Space"

American Dad is a maddeningly inconsistent series which, in any given run of four episodes, usually averages about one mediocre-to-crappy episode, two moderately enjoyable outings and one that's among the best sitcom episodes of its month, animated or live action. Those in the lattermost category include last year's "Ricky Spanish" and "Adventures in Hayleysitting," and now "Lost in Space," which isn't just good but phenomenal and one of the best episodes of the entire series.

Detaching entirely from the titular American dad and the core Smith family, this episode follows alien prisoner Jeff Fischer back to a space station above Roger's home planet, where he tries to figure out how to escape captivity in a big, stylish intergalactic musical action-adventure comedy extravaganza that might just be the year's most purely ambitious comedy episode. It almost felt like a whole space opera compressed into 22 minutes with jokes added, complete with a lot of really impressive alien design and massive, complicated "sets" that showed a hell of a lot of visual imagination. It had emotional depth that you never really associate with Seth MacFarlane and a bittersweet, melancholy ending. If only they'd ended the season here instead of one far lesser episode later.

2. Hannibal, Season 1 Episode 7 – "Sorbet"

Aka the dinner party episode. I have a whole podcast where this episode and my thoughts on it are discussed at respectable length, but suffice to say I thought the whole thing was chilling, gorgeously rendered perfection. The show – and this food-centric episode in particular – is simply intoxicating in a way that I rarely associate with TV. Or really any fiction, for that matter. The atmosphere is so thick, the visuals so elegantly rendered with a care for framing and color and craftsmanship that puts most feature films to shame, and Mads Mikkelsen's performance so charismatic and frightening (Hugh Dancy is also great, of course, but "Sorbet" is clearly Dr. Lecter's hour) that the show simply demands respect. It's stellar fucking television.

1. Arrested Development, Season 4 Episode 7 – "Colony Collapse"

Will Arnett was put on this earth to play Gob Bluth and it's no surprise that I loved catching up with one of the greatest television characters of all time. It's a massively enjoyable episode, possibly the only installment of season 4 that I'd truly stack up against the show's original '03-'06 run. More thoughts here! And with that I'm announcing my retirement from writing about Arrested Development until late December when it comes time to do my yearend wrap-up, because I adore the show, but at a certain point, goddamn do you burn out typing about one show no matter what it is. But do check out my season 1-3 rankings if you haven't seen them yet.

Best TV Episodes, December 2012

(I'm still a little burned out from writing my top fifty list, so I'm gonna keep this month's best episodes feature short and sweet. Look for me to return to my usual excessive verbiage in a month's time.)

10. Fringe, Season 5 Episode 9 – "Black Blotter"

Just a few hours shy of its likely grim and apocalyptic endgame, Fringe reminded us of its sense of humor in a winking episode fueled largely by Walter Bishop tripping on acid and building to a climactic Monty Python-esque animation sequence.

9. Arrow, Season 1 Episode 9 – "Year's End"

With the introduction of what seems to be its debut season's "big bad," Arrow took shape and found narrative focus in its last installment of 2012.

8. Last Resort, Season 1 Episode 9 – "Cinderella Liberty"

After slipping a bit episode by episode following an impressive pilot, Shawn Ryan's (soon-to-be-finished) naval thriller finally got the blood pumping in this tense, climactic hour, revolving around a hostage crisis at sea.

7. Parenthood, Season 4 Episode 10 – "Trouble in Candyland"

While this episode's focus on a more straightforward "antagonist" (Pamela Adlon's Marlyse, trying to shut down the Braverman brothers' recording studio) was a slightly odd change of pace for Parenthood, it came to a heartwarming conclusion that earned a huge smile. The episode also provided another strong, angsty showcase for Matt Lauria.

6. Boardwalk Empire, Season 3 Episode 12 – "Margate Sands"

A flawed finale in certain ways, but one thing's for sure: Richard Harrow rescuing Tommy was fuckin' fantastic.

5. American Dad!, Season 8 Episode 6 – "Adventures in Hayleysitting"

The sequence of graphic ultraviolence ending this episode was one of the darkest, funniest things I saw in any sitcom – animated or no – all year long. One of the best Steve and Hayley stories of the entire series.

4. The Vampire Diaries, Season 4 Episode 9 – "O Come, All Ye Faithful"

Capping off a half-season that occasionally felt stagnant, the final ten minutes of The Vampire Diaries' midseason finale assertively, violently reminded us that Klaus is not a Spike-esque lovable antihero or a grumpy harmless cartoon villain, but a full-fledged murderous bad guy, and thank god. Outside of the third season finale it's the show's best 2012 episode.

3. Homeland, Season 2 Episode 12 – "The Choice"

Was Homeland's second season finale dumb? Yes. Was it entertaining? Hell yes.

2. Fringe, Season 5 Episode 10 – "Anomaly XB-6783746"

Fringe did an awesome job raising the stakes in its final episode of 2012 and the fourth-to-last episode of the series, moving the greater plot forward and making damn sure that we sufficiently hate ultimate villain Captain Windmark going into the final stretch.

1. Bob's Burgers, Season 3 Episode 7 – "Tina-Rannosaurus Wrecks"

Tina very slowly crashing Bob's car is one of the most staggeringly fucking funny things I've seen on television in I can't even tell you how long. The rest of the episode ruled too, but seriously, that car crash is easily one of the greatest television scenes of 2012. (Also, I assume the #1 slot on these monthly best episodes lists is going to be dominated by dramas – especially as we enter this uncertain, Dan Harmonless fourth season of Community – so I'm going to leap on every opportunity to put a sitcom in the top slot.)

Top Fifty TV Shows of 2012: #30 - 11

Ok, we've gotten through #50-31, which only contained about seven or eight shows I can really say I like, and, to be perfectly honest, I only did as a way to organize my thoughts and to passive-aggressively antagonize people whose favorite show didn't make the cut. But now the wheat has been separated from the chaff, and my #30-11 contains a full twenty shows I like, and even a few I consider personal favorites. Let's go:   

30. The Daily Show (Comedy Central)

By percentage, I've seen far less of what The Daily Show aired in 2012 than anything else in my top forty. But the closer we got to November 6th and the more inescapable electoral politics became, the more I found myself tuning in to Jon Stewart for a little nightly mental and emotional salving. I admit I tend to forget The Daily Show when there's no major news story and the guest isn't a sitting or ex-president, but during election season, it's the best. (You can also consider this an honorary slot for The Colbert Report and The Rachel Maddow Show, the only other non-DNC, non-election night political programs I watched more than ten minutes of in 2012.)

29. Gravity Falls (Disney)

Basically a mix of The X-Files, The Simpsons, and whatever kids-go-on-adventures cartoon you care to name, Disney's new Gravity Falls is a colorful, creative blend of sci-fi/fantasy/horror anthology and animated sitcom. The show's writing staff includes veterans of Community, Adventure Time, and Veronica Mars, the jokes hit fast, and the worldbuilding has been superb for just twelve episodes. The season also got better as it went along, with my four favorite episodes – involving cloning mishaps, time travel shenanigans, video game characters coming to life, and a freaky, Miyazaki-esque Halloween monster – all falling in the second half of the show's run. If this quality incline continues, I could see Gravity Falls shooting way up on my 2013 list.

28. Sherlock (PBS)

Sherlock's three-episode 2012 run presents a bit of a puzzle: How do I rank a show when I found a third of it exceptional, a third of it good, and a third of it bordering on horrible? Because make no mistake, the second episode of Sherlock's second season, "The Hounds of Baskerville," sucked. From atrocious CGI to its nonsense final reveals, it sucked. On the other hand, the third, Holmes vs. Moriarty-centric episode, "The Reichenbach Fall," was quite enjoyable, and the season premiere, "A Scandal in Belgravia," was a dizzying spectacle of twists and turns, reveals I found fiendishly clever, a final moment that ranks among the best TV scenes of the year, and a wonderful use of Irene Adler. In the end, I have to dock Sherlock for "Hounds" – it is a third of the season – but if it had another episode on par with "Scandal" instead, it'd be in my top ten.